What am I going to do II, the sequel.

I still cannot believe that Madame is marrying again so soon especially as I have said before I thought this whole palaver was a temporary, if long term glitch which we could get past and eventually put behind us.
I suppose I must move on though, it isn't worth me spending any more time or emotion on what now looks to be a failed relationship. No matter how much I want it to be resurrected I cannot see it being so unless madame comes back after this latest foray into marital bliss fails. Not that I wish her ill, that is just my take on the whole saga.
I am up and down like a hotel lift when I think about how, with a little more communication and flexibility on both sides we could have maybe steered the ship of our marriage away from the rocks of divorce. Still, that ship has sailed, the past has gone and all the 'what ifs' in the world can't change what has gone before. Forward is the only option; either into happiness or a lonely old age, who knows, the future is a foreign country into which we travel like a car driving through fog on the motorway, no-one knows what is ahead until they hit it. The trick is not to hit too hard and survive to enjoy the consequences.
The last two years have been dreadful and many times a combination of cowardice, the fact that I have the kitties to look after and the thought that Madame and I might reconcile has kept me on this earth. I saw a cartoon in a magazine the other day which brought home the fact that where there's life there's hope. A man had just kicked away the stool on which he had been standing with a rope around his neck when the telephone loudspeaker came on with his wife saying 'Darling, I've won the lotto and want to reconcile' That epitomises why I could never take that ultimate step, it only takes a second for things to improve and if you are gone there's no coming back.
On that happy note I will close and say that I plan to hang on in there and hope for things to improve. I've been through worse than this and have come through the other side so wish me luck and Per Ardua Ad Astra.
ttfn