I just don't know.

I'm writing this sitting on a settee at The Brother's with a sinking feeling that I'm never going to find a decent place to live along with feeling that I've outstayed my welcome here.
The Sister-in Law I'm sure is sick of me being in her house making a mess by being a bloke and wants me out of her hair.
The problem is that I have no-one to confide in, no-one with whom I can sit down and pour out my fears and desires without the feeling that they aren't particularly bothered and would rather I just shut up and went away.
It is great that the Brother is allowing me to stay with him and I am extremely grateful but I really do feel that I have outstayed my welcome and should move on, but where to?
I can't talk to Madame as it seems all she cared about was getting the house sold and having her share of the proceeds. Much as I wish things could be different I have to accept that she is gone and although we may be keeping in touch she has little interest in being my 'other half' again, that ship sailed last year when she went to the USA for two months to plan her life without me and our subsequent divorce.
I have a couple of good friends in Glasgow with whom I'm in regular touch and as I say I know that The Brother wouldn't see my out on the street but I really need a confidant, someone to be close to who will listen to my problems; someone that I can feel is 'on my side' who will be around when I need them, someone I have never had even when I was married (both times), although for a while I did think Madame was that person but now, well she has gone away so...
Anyway the point of all this is to talk to whoever reads this tripe that I write and get the feelings out of my head and at least written down to release some of the unhappiness that would otherwise overwhelm me.
I hoped that selling up would free me and to a certain extent it has. I am in a better position financially than I was this time last year but emotionally I'm still scared of the future and of ending up a sad lonely old man.
I have no-one who will hold my hand, actually as well as metaphorically while the future just sits and looks at me with a quizzical expression on its face as if to say 'well come on then, I'm waiting come and grab me and get on with your life'.
Sorry that I'm not much fun today, I just feel lost, scared and alone and needed to get it out of my system.
Let's hope that tomorrow is a better day.